To date or not to date? (Part I)

When was the last time you were single and all your friends try to introduce someone to you so that you can start dating as soon as possible?

When was the last time you have came out from a bad relationship feeling all wore and tired? Have you ever felt that you have enough pain from past relationships and will back off when someone likes you approach you and started asking you out?

So why does so many relationship fail and what is the reason people walk out from a relationship feeling disappointed, heart broken and frustrated?

I was reading this book called "Choosing God's Best" and it talked about dating vs courtship.

Dating:

• Man centered;
• 'shop around' for Mr or Miss right;
• two people become obsess with each other;
• simply to enjoy each other's company;
• Do not need to commit/ seriously consider marriage or bonding now but possibly later;
• consider immediate pleasure usually in the physical sense.

Courtship:

• God planned and God centered;
• no casual 'tryout' or 'shop around';
• in the beginning two people are only to spend limited amount of time together and very little amount of time one on one;
• its a convenant between the 2 people and God and is reserved for couples spiritually and emotionally mature ready for marriage;
• only become physically, spiritually and emotionally involved should it be in God's will and the 2 people married.
  

As you can see that the dating system would create so much pain in a relationship, to name a few - unexpected pregnancy, abortion, illegitimate children and divorce. These could all contribute to destructive pain and they could last a life time!

Therefore, by following God's way in finding a partner, you can bypass the need to suffer emotionally and physically "for I know the plans I have for you" "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11)

God has created man and realised his needs and so God has created woman. In another word, God has created relationship and he understands our needs. He is the one that created our needs in companionship in the first place!

And God wants you to be patient to wait for his calling for your other half. He wanted you to 'be' the right person instead of to 'look' for the right person! Godly marriages are made by living a glodly lives first! Therefore, to become involve in ministry and church service, you are preparing yourself spiritually to be the right person for your future half.

The greatest enemy is our own complusion to choose what we think is best for ourselves instead of what god think is best for you!

With God's help, I am sure He can help you to avoid relationship failures from now on.